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Diet-toons

(Click a toon for the punch line.)
×

“Today I will live in the moment.

“Unless it’s unpleasant.

“In which case I will eat a doughnut.”

🤣

×

“Maybe eating cookies wasn’t cheating on my diet.

“Maybe going on a diet was cheating on my cookies.”

😂

×
“I don’t measure a thing.
 
“When I cook . . . I just sprinkle and add stuff until I hear the spirit of my ancestors whisper ‘That’s enough child.'”
 
🤣
×
​A women’s group was discussing diet tips.
 
When it was mentioned that getting enough exercise and sleep were just as important as watching food intake, one woman responded with surprise that sleep was a factor.
 
Another replied, “Of course sleep is a factor. The only time I’m not eating is when I’m sleeping.“
 
😂
 
×

​“The toughest part of a diet
isn’t watching what you eat. 

“It’s watching what other
people eat.”
 
😂
×

“Just cleared out some

space in the freezer”

sounds so much more

productive than “I just

polished off another

pint of ice cream.”

🤣

×
“𝐌𝐲 𝐟𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐞𝐱𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐢𝐬𝐞
 
𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠.”
 
😂
×
“I only lost one pound
before I quit my diet.
 
“But if I can do that 50 times,
I’ll lose 50 pounds!”
 
😂
      
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