Published on January 17, 2017
In my blog, Just Say “No” To Food Pushers, I wrote about the scourge of those who cannot take “No” for answer. It’s time to do so again.
It seems some people relish (no pun intended) that role, and often it’s because they’re miserable in their own bodies. The holiday season, Thanksgiving through New Year’s Eve, is especially a time when food pushers tend to come out of the woodwork and since we’ve just come through the holidays, this has been the topic of discussion with many clients over the last couple of weeks. So, in advance of the next major food-pushing holidays of Passover and Easter, and as a public service to those who dread or are just sick and tired of having food pushed into your face, let me provide you with the text you can send to anyone you know who will, at the first opportunity, say to you: “Oh, come on [insert your name], one piece won’t kill you.”
Dear Food Pusher,
When I politely refuse your offer of cake, chocolate, alcohol, or stuffed sausage, please don’t ask me four more times, and please don’t tell me that (a) I’m missing out, or (b) one piece won’t kill me. I’m well aware that your chocolate cake is not lethal but, nonetheless, I simply don’t want any. And no . . . this doesn’t make me weird, deprived or boring.
While I appreciate your kind initial offering, I’m not a fan of the subsequent repeated questioning, coercing, or commentary. Just as I respect your right to put whatever you like in your mouth and body, perhaps you could do the same for me without feedback or judgment. For people like me who have a history of being overweight or obese and who work very hard to lose weight, trying to persuade me to eat certain foods is analogous to encouraging a reformed alcoholic to have ‘just one beer’ or a recovering drug addict to have ‘just one more line.’ It’s insensitive and inappropriate.
If you think this brief letter is an overreaction, then (a) your reality is not mine; and (b) you needed to read it.
Yours sincerely,
[insert your name here]
While the above is from an obese person (or anyone struggling with their weight) to a food pusher, the same words could be used by a person who has lost weight and works hard (and it is hard) every day to maintain it.
For those of you who have never had a weight problem, who work like crazy to eat right, exercise and maintain a healthy weight, I don’t want to leave you out. If you too have people in your life who just will not take your “No” for an answer and say, “Oh, come on, you’re in great shape, one piece won’t kill you,” my advice would be to say:
“Thanks, I am in great shape because I know when to say NO.”
The bottom line: Never allow anyone to make your food their business.
Slimcerely yours℠,
