Talk Nicely to Yourself

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Talk nicely to yourself.

Sounds simple, I know. You’d think no one really needed to be told this, right? Au contraire.

Everyone I meet in my office wants to lose weight and be happy, healthy, and successful. Most have been trying for a long time, and all really want that more than anything else. Yet too often I hear them talk down to themselves. If this is you, I’ll ask you the same three questions I ask them. And be honest.

1. Would you be friends with someone who constantly told you how fat you looked? Probably not for very long.
2. Would you tolerate a friend who constantly berates you, who never misses an opportunity to tell you you’re hopeless and weak and that you’ll never lose weight? I doubt it. 
3. Why, then, do you put up with that kind of crappy, abusive talk to yourself?

Talk to yourself like you would someone you love.

When we’re working on achieving something (starting a new business, kicking a bad habit or addiction, etc.) we wouldn’t be human if we never had a twinge of self-doubt as to whether or not we’d achieve it, whether it’s possible. But I suggest to you that every time you hear that little negative voice inside your head, stop whatever it is you’re doing at the time and think of something to encourage yourself — which is, let’s face it, EXACTLY what any of us would do if we were trying to encourage a friend, right? So, instead of the negative self-talk, say out loud to yourself, “Okay, I’m not as slim and fit as I’d like to be yet, but I’m working on it. I’m making progress, and I’m feeling really good about that.”

My advice to anyone who wants something so badly (weight loss or otherwise), has put in time and effort (and, no doubt, lots of money as well), and is berating or belittling themselves with “Why did I ever think I could start and finish this?” or “I’m kidding myself, I can’t do this,” is to, first, quietly reflect on that. Then, give yourself credit for taking a chance, for following a dream or passion, for what you may have been able to accomplish thus far, and then . . . just get back at it. Also, seek advice from a mentor, a counselor, a colleague, a positive role model, or small business advocate, whichever applies.

To see change in yourself, talk nicely to yourself.

Be good to yourself, take care of yourself, believe in yourself and you will succeed.