Published on April 21, 2018
While women are more of the habitual dieters, yo-yo’ing their way from one quick-fix product or program to the next, in my experience it’s the men who opt not to seek professional assistance, preferring to try to do it on their own. I’ve been told by many of them that it is because they are more hesitant to share their personal feelings as to how their weight affects them. Over the years, however, many male clients have spoken candidly about the things that most bothered them about their weight. Here are just a few:
Fellas, if your wife is bothering you about your weight, it’s because she loves you . . . and wants to spend a long, enjoyable life together. If she’s slim, and if you’re not the same slim, happy-go-lucky, can-do-anything kind of guy that she married, or the man with all kinds of sports/fitness hobbies that she also loved to do with you—like golfing, boating, running, swimming, skiing, tennis—then your weight also affects her quality of life. Try to see her point of view. Try to see the tables turned, and ask yourself how you would feel.
It’s not only for the sustained mutual physical attraction that we should want to take care of ourselves. We should want to take care of ourselves so we can maintain good health for the duration of our marriages. With obesity, comes medical issues. With medical issues, comes limitations. How do you want to spend the rest of your life with your wife? Do you want to do things and go places? Or, do you want her to spend time taking care of you, reminding you which medications to take, and accompanying you to a myriad of doctors appointments?
Also think of your children. Do you ever think about how your obesity affects them? Do you worry about how concerned they might be about your weight and health? Do you think they worry about the many milestones in their lives that you’d miss if your obesity lead to your early mortality? Perhaps they worry about their mother being left a widow way before her time.
Obesity affects men and women about equally, but men of all ages bear a particular burden, since obesity takes a special toll on male hormones, sexuality, and prostate health:
If you are a very overweight or obese male who, when you look down, cannot see your feet (or your privates!), what are you weighting for?