Published on August 8, 2020
I meet so many new clients who, after years of trying every new short-term diet that comes out, have attitudes of defeat and beliefs that they’ve talked themselves into as to why they can’t lose weight.
Some weight loss beliefs are so far removed from reality, and I have seen many overweight people become trapped in them. And when they become trapped in any of these myths, they find it difficult to lose weight, to achieve the body they desire, and all the great things that go with it: physically, emotionally, psychologically.
Beliefs are not always true, and beliefs are not facts.
I want to address some of them today, in no particular order.
#1 – I’m just destined to be overweight or obese, and there’s not much I can do about it.
You know this isn’t true. You can view countless before-and-after weight loss success videos on YouTube or view similar photos on social media platforms, and you know that losing weight is humanly possible, no matter how obese a person is or how many times they may have failed in the past. It’s not that you are destined to be overweight. You just haven’t yet done the things necessary or adopted the right weight loss strategies to make it happen.
#2 – I’m not motivated enough right now. When I can’t fit into my clothes anymore, I’ll be really motivated, and I’ll get serious about losing weight then.
OK, first, when you can no longer fit into your clothes, you won’t be really motivated: you’ll be really desperate.
. . . and why are you waiting to be desperate before you take action to reduce your weight?
Would you rather wait until you get sick or become disabled? If that happens, you’ll surely regret you didn’t take action sooner. Besides, it’s a myth to assume that being highly motivated is what you need to get started. Being highly motivated might help you to lose weight in the short-run, but it will backfire on you and cause you to gain all the weight back anyway.
Why? Because what happens when you eventually reach your weight loss goal? All your “motivators” will be gone then (you’ll look better, feel better, fit into your clothes, etc.). So now what will drive you to stick to your eating or exercise plan? Nothing will drive you and you’ll revert to your previous habits.
So don’t wait to feel super motivated in order to begin losing weight. And don’t base your weight loss efforts on traditional motivators anyway. Find a motivator that won’t go away once you lose all the weight you want.
#3 – Even if I work real hard to lose weight, I’m just going to yo-yo back to where I started from, or even worse.
Yes, yo-yo dieting and weight gain rebounding are extremely common. And yes, working very hard to lose weight, only to see it all come back weeks or months later is hugely demoralizing. But just because this problem is common, doesn’t mean it is inevitable or that it has to happen for you. Plenty of people have discovered how to lose weight and keep it off permanently. You just have to know how to do it and follow through on a well-constructed post-weight-loss game plan.
Unfortunately, most diet and weight loss programs don’t adequately prepare you for doing this. I must say, however, that I do. I put all my clients through an 18-week stabilization and maintenance program which is just as disciplined and structured and personally guided as the weight loss programs.
#4 – I’ll never lose weight and keep it off because I eat to relieve stress and that won’t be changing.
Here again is a very common problem that is not at all unsolvable.
Yes, if you ALWAYS turn to food and overeating to comfort yourself or calm yourself down whenever you are stressed, you will find it hard to lose weight and keep it off. But there are better and more effective ways to calm down, eliminate stress, and make negative emotions quickly disappear without turning to alcohol, illegal drugs, cigarettes or food in order to quickly feel better.
#5 – I don’t even want to try losing weight again because the pain of failing one more time would be just too terrible for me to bare.
Unfortunately, most people who try to lose weight and fail, especially if they do this repeatedly, almost always end up in this pit of despair and inner humiliation. They have little confidence in their ability to succeed at losing weight. They won’t even begin to try again because they’ve already concluded that their efforts will end up in failure, so why put themself through all the torture and eventual painful feelings of loss.
Here again, there may be good reasons why all of your previous efforts ended in failures. And some of those reasons may have little to do with YOU. Instead, they can be blamed upon poor weight loss program design, improper weight loss preparatory training, and many other false theories and assumptions, like some of those I’m addressing here.
Don’t make the mistake of assuming that just because you failed many times in the past, your situation is permanently hopeless. Sure each time you try and fail, this can be painful. But trying again—especially if you try very differently—may just pay off eventually, if you are fortunate enough to get the right guidance.
#6 – Every time I go on a diet I just quit because I feel so miserable.
Quitting appears to be the name of the game when it comes to dieting or otherwise trying to lose weight. So many people start out with such great intentions and determination, only to end up quitting somewhere prior to succeeding.
Some quit because they don’t see results fast enough and then get discouraged.
Some quit because the people around them don’t support their efforts to change.
Some quit because they start making excuses and breaking their promises and then get angry at themselves for not being perfect.
And some end up quitting because the behavior changes they try to make end up making them feel miserable. Whether it is dieting that makes you feel miserable or exercising that makes you feel miserable (or both) you are certainly not alone. And many people feel miserable because either they are totally resisting the need to lose weight and just going through the motions half-ass, seeing no results and being frustrated; or, they’re miserable because of the manner in which they choose to diet. I mean, I’d be miserable too if I went on a quack diet of 600 calories a day.
However, nobody said that you had to turn weight loss into misery. You somehow decided to do this, so if you made it happen, you can eventually figure out how to succeed at losing weight without going through misery.
Plenty of people have learned how to do this. You just have to become one of them.
#7 – I don’t even want to try losing weight again because the pain of failing one more time would be just too terrible for me to bare.
#8 – I tried so many different ways in the past and worked so hard; I’ve done it all and nothing new is going to work for me.
This is “resignation,” a very strong belief that nothing is going to help you resolve a problem. A tremendously dis-empowering belief. Again, just because your previous efforts may have all failed doesn’t really mean that all hope is lost. It may just mean that you haven’t found the right solution or strategy or comprehensive weight loss game plan yet. These solutions do exist (and I’m one of them, for example), and they could be right in front of you and you won’t be able to see them if you’ve already given up hope and are trapped in the mind set of resignation.
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I’ve personally worked with many clients over the years who thought they had “tried it all” and that nothing was going to work with them. They discovered they really could lose weight and keep it off, once they found the support to approach the task in a very different, healthy and sustainable way.
Remember:
The worst of all beliefs are self-limiting beliefs.
Slimcerely yours℠,
